Last day in Croatia

Could have had a lie in as it was a free day but as they had forecast a thunderstorm at 2pm we wanted to get out and do things before then. So down for breakfast just after 7 and I filled my bowl with semolina and porridge; it's gorgeous!
We got the service bus at 8-30 and it was packed with locals going to work. It was a beautiful sunny morning and we were up on the castle walls at 9. I had accepted George's challenge to have my photo taken in the same spot as him. It must be a couple of miles round the entire walls and involves climbing 2 million steps but I found what I thought was the spot, then had to place the lovely Janet where I thought Callie must have taken G's photo. It was only later that we got the chance to compare the 2 and the brick pattern proved I got it exactly right, so that's 50 kunas G owes me.
It was so hot we had to find a shaded cafe for a sit down and a beer (at 10-15am!).
Then we got on a boat and sailed down the coast to Cavtat which is a lovely little seaside resort, and it was fairly quiet too. Had lunch at a cafe on the seafront. I had a large beer which cost less than Mum's lemonade! They had swordfish steak on the menu but I had to remember I get a big dinner so just had a ham and cheese sandwichy type of thing, which was delicious.
After we sailed back to Dubrovnik the thunderstorm should have occurred but it never did. It stayed hot and sunny, so we had a wander round the old town and had a last ice cream and got the bus back to the hotel. I had another beer and a siesta.
For tea I had steak (yes just the one main item but with all the trimmings) and managed to fit 4 different types of cake (they're not massive pieces, honest) under my ice cream.
The only thing left to mention is that your mother has become a floosy! Every time I turn my back on her some old bloke jumps in and chats her up. My only solace is beer.

A day in Montenegro

Today set the record for earliest get-up. Alarm set for 6 and down for breakfast at 6-45. Still felt delicate but discovered a wonderful breakfast combo; boiled semolina in milk, with porridge. It was excellent. The reason for setting off at such a ridiculous time was to try get through Customs before the rush, as we headed for yet another new country, Montenegro. This was a coincidence as the news was full of Donald Trump elbowing Montenegro's prime minister out of the way at the G7 conference! Sure enough the border crossing was a bind and I guess this will become the norm once we leave the EU.
So here we have Croatia which is in the EU, but doesn't use the euro. Montenegro is not in the EU but does use the euro. Crazy! First stop was a little coastal village called Perast. There are no public loos there but there is a tiny little island about 300 metres off the coast which has a very small church, a gift shop and free toilets. So we paid 5 euros for a boat ride to the island so we could have a wee, then sailed back!
We then drove around the edge of the bay to a walled town at the foot of very steep, rocky cliffs, called Kotor. It was a nice place and we bought a decoration for the Christmas tree, as you do in mid summer. By the way, the moron with the bells keeps following us. He rang them in Dubrovnik yesterday morning and tried again at noon today in Kotor. But I don't care how loud his tune is, I'm not buying one of his ice creams. Then, to save endless miles driving round the bay we got a ferry across it. It's only a small drive on drive off ferry but there were 2 coaches and a few cars on it. It only takes 15 minutes but I still stood on deck like we used to when crossing the Channel all those years ago. So, 2 boat rides in one day; I must be on holiday!
Return border crossing was slightly less of a pain as we got to watch a sniffer dog checking out the cars and it barked like mad by an Italian car. Don't think they found anything as they let him go but, they were so excited about that they lost interest in the red tape of our passports and waved us on!

Wet and miserable

I woke in the night with cramp; apart from being painful it's usually a bad omen. I then laid awake feeling a bit ill. As ever they wanted us up early and we had to rush breakfast. I just had a bowl of porridge!
The coach drove us into Dubrovnik and left us there for the day. But, as the UK is apparently having a heatwave it literally chucked it down all day here! We don't go on holidays for the weather but it is always nicer when it's warm and dry. We had a guided tour of the old town but there were several cruise ships in the harbour so there must have been 20 or 30 other similar guided tours on at the same time. As most people were carrying umbrellas it was hard to see things and we spent most of our time trying to avoid getting our eyes poked out! To make matters worse I felt less well as the tour progressed til it reached the point that I needed the toilet, so I asked our tour manager and she took me to a nearby restaurant to use theirs. It was very tiny, one gents and one ladies but a guy went in the gents just as I got there, so I went in the ladies.
Sure enough when I came out there was a woman waiting and she gave me a look and tutted, so I gave her my best Mr Bean shrug and said sorry.
The tour ended and we had the rest of the day to ourselves but we were getting wetter all the time and it was pretty uncomfortable. We had a coffee at an outside cafe table with a big parasol but, eventually the weight of water overwhelmed the parasol and it tipped over a German lady! We'd had enough and got the bus back to the hotel. I was feeling really quite ill by then and slept all afternoon.
Didn't feel up to eating til 8-30 which is very late for us and I suddenly got my appetite back. Had sea trout, squid, steak with potatoes, zucchini and broccoli. Hope I don't regret it later and that I sleep tonight as we have to be up at 6 !!! to go to Montenegro tomorrow

Five countries in one day!

So, Rasputin the mad monk did his trick at 5-30am again. I must have slept through it on Monday morning! But it wasn't as if it woke me too early as we had to get breakfast at 7 as soon as the dining room opened as they wanted our cases in reception and ready to leave at 7-45! Not really sure why we have to set off so early every day! The bus seat rotation plan was applied again but some of them had ignored it and others were just totally confused by it, so we just sat in an empty seat. A couple of old women were most put out that others (not us) were, allegedly in their seats but as nobody offered to move they were stuck with it, although it was clear they were not happy! We've decided we'll just sit where there's a space in future and let them argue among themselves!
Now it gets complicated. We started off this morning in Croatia (when we left our hotel in Omit) and ended the day also in Croatia (in our new hotel in Dubrovnik) but we crossed into Bosnia Hertzagovina twice! They used to be part of the same country when it was Yugoslavia but now Croatia is in the EU (but doesn't use the Euro) and Bosnia wants to be in the EU but they won't let them join. So, when you leave Croatia the bus has to stop and a customs officer takes all the passports and scans them through their system. This takes around 20 minutes. You then drive 50 metres and the Bosnian customs take the passports to scan. That's another 20 minutes. This was so we could go to Mostar for lunch, which was excellent as per what's app photos already seen.
But then it gets worse. You reach the border and have to go through the same 2 procedures again! But 20 miles down the coast you reach the border again. This is because Bosnia would be landlocked so they gave them a 5 mile stretch of coast.
So driving along the same little coastal road that entails getting through another 4 customs posts. Tedious! In total then we've been in Croatia 3 times and Bosnia twice today!
New hotel is different but very nice and although the food is still self service if you want something like steak the chef cooks it in front of you. The only thing was that, at lunchtime I decided I was definitely going to a particular riverside bar/grill just to enjoy the view. The waiter suggested we try a mixed grill platter and a vegetable platter to share and it was fabulous ( I might even say luscious Faye!) but I was so full, we didn't eat til 8-30 tonight and I took it easy. Just had roast beef and roast potatoes etc. Mum worries that I'm becoming an alcofrolic just because I got 3 lots of beer in to stock up the room so I don't get tempted by the mini bar!

I've Split my Trogir

I was woken at 5-30 this morning by some mad monk who thought it would be a good idea to ring all the church bells as loud as he could for 10 minutes! I hope he got his cassock caught in the ropes.
We left at 8 anyway and the tour guide asked people to move 3 seats forward and switch sides on the coach so everyone got a fair turn. How to confuse old people in one move! It was chaos but we just waited til they'd all sat down and sat in an empty one.
We went to Split (damn, I've already done that joke) which apart from being the home of Hajduk Split who we once played in the UEFA cup in the 60's, is also where the first Roman Emperor built a palace to retire to. It's still standing and people have apartments in it! We had a guided tour and then spent 2 hours wandering round. It's a very nice seaside resort. I had a very large slice of spinach, onion and garlic pizza type of pasty. It's a Croatian delicacy apparently.
Back on the bus and drove to Trogir which was a smaller version of Split. There was a castle and even though our English Heritage membership didn't seem valid, we went in. There was literally nothing in but you could climb right up to the top for a brilliant view of the town and harbour. They don't do Health and safety in Croatia. Wear a seatbelt or crash helmet if you want. Climb up 200 feet with no safety barriers or railings, who cares! We then had a luscious piece of cake in a cafe.
When we got back to Omis we went straight out for an optional boat ride, inland up the river. It's a very beautiful country and the height of the mountains is amazing.
Spoilt for choice at tea. I had fish (hake), lasagne and stroganoff with potatoes, cauliflower, carrots and little trees as Dylan calls broccoli. I wanted to try a veal cutlet but thought I was pushing my luck. Had a Karlovacko beer which is the official beer of Hajduk Split!

A whole day spent in one country

So here we are on holiday and the alarm goes off at 7am. And it gets worse later in the week! The shower is odd. You have to climb in the bath and the little glass screen doesn't cover the area where the water goes, so the bathroom floor was awash when I stepped out!
Had a big breakfast to last us through the day, and on the coach; we were told to go down for it at 8-15 but when I looked down from the balcony at five past all the old dears are moving their fastest all day, to get the seats at the front! We quite happily sat at the back.
We drove along the coast from Omish to Split, then split (see what I did there?) to go inland. There is a brand new motorway goes through the middle of Croatia. When the Balkans war ended 25 years ago this had been a war zone but they need to attract tourists with roads like they are used to at home (excluding brexit Britain of course as they have all lanes open, no road works and very little traffic, plus their service areas are civilised). The idea is that eventually you will be able to drive right across the Balkans and this part of Europe but, sadly I will be too old to drive it by the time it's finished!
Anyway we arrived at the National Park at Krka near Sibenik. It's a magnificent place and you walk across the many little streams that feed the main lake, on boardwalks. Had a second ice cream in 2 days, then got on a boat which took us down river to Skradin. Mum sat down with all the landlubbers but I did my best captain impression, standing at the stern, looking out for pirates.
Skradin is a nice little seaside place and the idea was to have lunch there, but we didn't need any so walked a bit then sat in the shade, like the locals do.
Long coach trip back, then change for dinner (even me!). They had mackerel tonight which I like but there was just a tourine full of complete, dead fish. Call me squeamish but I can't eat something that is looking at me and still has it's hat and coat on! There was also fish stew but there were all kinds of furry bits sticking out, so I just had some of everything else. Had 2 beers today as it's been so hot.

From Wilsden to Omit

Another year, another adventure. Up at 4am, one of us was bright eyed and bushy tailed; the other thought she'd (clue there!) been shot. Away by 5 and over the hills to Yeadon (did you know Murgatroyds don't do early breakfast specials; a gap in the market?). Everything went according to plan and we took off just after 7-15, but then the bushy tail sagged and one of us dozed three quarters of the flight!
Dubrovnik airport isn't massive but it's fine. We found the travel guide and got on the right bus, but then the nightmare started. Omit is apparently approximately 1400 miles from Dubrovnik by road; as the crow flies it's about 50 miles but this part of the world is just mountains and bays, so you drive 30 miles on winding roads just to get to a point half a mile across some water!
We started in Croatia then crossed the border into Bosnia. 20 miles later we crossed back into Croatia. One country is nearly in the EU and the other isn't so we were warned that the Bosnia customs might be a bit sniffy and insist on examining everyone's passport. But when our driver told them we were just a bunch of brexit brits he said we could enter.
But then, on re-entering Croatia they decided to be awkward and wanted to see all passports. But then our driver said something (in Croat) along the lines of they've just had their passports scanned at our airport so why do you want to do it again you divvy? He then waved us on.
We had stopped for a delicious Bosnian ice cream while we were in their country. They have their own currency but happily took Croatian money, but not Euros.
Happily upon finally reaching Omit it's a lovely little seaside place and our hotel is literally next to the beach. Nice room with a balcony on the third floor and our neighbour is Geoff from Halifax; I like meeting people from all over the world while on holiday!
So to the evening meal and it's a serve yourself buffet, so I had chicken with tagliatelle, beef stew and baked red snapper all on the same plate (mum had chips and a sausage). The snapper was nice but contains multiple lethal bones!
For pudding and hear this Mr and Mrs Saunders, I had garlic pasty! Very thin pastry the thickness of a pancake, full of garlicky green stuff ( or might it be cannabis?). Good job I also had dough balls (you can tell by the way I walk) to sweeten it. Also had a nice panacotta. I can't understand why I keep putting on weight!
Finished off with some Ozujsko beer (wonder if they sell that in my Polish shop?)